Imaginary Friend

I'll admit it. While I was growing up, I never had an imaginary friend. My creative streak never quite touched that particular plane. Certainly, I had special drummed-up scenarios I created for myself. Often, I was someone else. But making up another character to join me in these adventures? Not really. Gouda has always been something of a loner at heart.

The tradition of non-imaginary-friend-ism continued with my daughter. We seemed identical in this regard in that we would form attachments to physical objects like dolls or stuffed animals, but having a 9-foot tall purple wildebeast who had to be set a separate place at the table? Again, not so much. My son, on the other hand, has decided to embark upon the quest of creating an invisible playmate. This person rides in our car and apparently accompanies Elias to preschool. According to my son, this person has brown hair, light brown skin, brown eyes, and pink lips. And the person's name?


That's right. Explodie. He apparently got that name because he explodes when he gets mad.

So yeah, my son's imaginary friend is an Islamo-terrorist. I want to ask Elias if Explodie is wearing a bulky-looking vest or whether Explodie has a middle name like "al" or "bin." Of course, I should probably keep this information on the down low. I'd really hate for my 4-year-old to end up on a No Fly List or having to take a trip down to Gitmo for his association with terrorists.

Right now, I'm going to keep a close eye on this Explodie character. I don't want to be reactionary. Maybe Explodie is trying to turn over a new leaf by inserting himself into a family of infidels. But if Elias starts asking when he is going to get his 72 virgins or growing a long beard, I might have to call Homeland Security myself. I have to do my part to keep America safe.


  1. I saw a cartoon where the main guy explodes when he gets upset. I think it was on nickelodeon.

  2. You know, Hammer, this doesn't surprise me in the slightest. Elias loves his Nicktoons, and he memorizes pretty much everything he learns on them. I wouldn't be surprised if this wasn't something from Kappa Mikey or The Secret Show. lol But I do get a kick out of someone of this admittedly vague description being named "Explodie." lol

  3. Elias is the man. I wouldn't worry too much about him, unless he develops a yen for falfels and hummus. Cheers!!

  4. Allie, when our son was little he had an imaginary boss. Apparently, 'Ralph' was in retail. When we asked what Ralph sold in his store, the reply was 'tires and cheese'.

  5. I had an imaginary friend named Harmony. He lived in trees and was actually a ghost. I was a psychopath as a child.

  6. I never really understood the whole imaginary friend phenomenon as a kid. It might be because I was never really the leader of the group and I wouldn't have been able to think of things for both of us to do.

  7. Look, I apologize for this, but E was begging for some Tenacious D. Wonderboy seemed a little over the top, so we listened to Explosivo a few times on the way home.

  8. Matt -- I actually have a yen for those things. Oh fuck...

    Doc -- Tires and cheese? Sounds like the Lunch Counter daily special. lol

    TF -- No, you would only be a psychopath if you used Harmony to kill people.

    SQT - I think you explained my reluctance to the idea perfectly. I'm more of a follower myself as well. lol

    Ken-- That's freakin hilarious. We really should be more mindful of what we allow our kids to listen to. lol

  9. This is cute in the way that only a child's mind could come up with something like this. Elias and Explodie!

    I played alone quite a bit, so I would dream up scenarios and act them out... but I never did have one particular imaginary friend.

    To follow on hammer's comment, I remember the cartoon Animaniacs had a skit called Katie Ka-Boom, in which Katie would always get upset over some small detail and asplode.